


why did I write this

by sadlonelyyogurt



Category: The Outsiders - All Media Types
Genre: Everyone Is Gay, Humor, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, The Author Regrets Everything, The Author Regrets Nothing, This is so fucking dumb, stevepop
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-20
Updated: 2020-01-20
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:47:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 516
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22338763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sadlonelyyogurt/pseuds/sadlonelyyogurt
Summary: Inspired by something I saw on tumblr. This is really just meant to be funny lolalso it's total trash just warning you
Relationships: Sodapop Curtis/Steve Randle
Comments: 6
Kudos: 44





	why did I write this

**Author's Note:**

> Ok so I’m literally in the middle of a different Stevepop fic that’s actually quality (I hope), BUT I saw that thing on tumlr that’s like “my brother and his “friend” are arguing over who would top… oh ok now they’re comparing dick sizes WAIT I THINK THEY’RE FUCKING HOLY SHIT” and I was like “haha this would be so funny from Ponyboy’s perspective” and then I wrote this piece of garbage instead of my history paper.  
> (so pls leave kudos it will help me cope with my bad grades and lack of sleep)
> 
> Also another note homophobia doesn’t exist in this bc homophobia is doodoo and i said so.

“Ponyboy,” Two-Bit whispered urgently, motioning him out of the kitchen. Ponyboy reluctantly followed. Whenever Two-Bit had something in mind Ponyboy was instantly suspicious. “I think Sodapop and Randle are _arguing_.”

“What?” Steve and Soda never fought. Ponyboy had only seen the two of them mad at each other maybe twice in his life. “What about?”

“Not a clue,” Two-Bit replied. “But I’m scared.”

The pair of them peaked into Soda and Ponyboy’s bedroom. They didn't actually _look_ that mad- in fact, Steve had what Ponyboy thought looked like a satisfactory smirk on his face. Nevertheless, their argument could be heard loud and clear.

“... Sodapop, you literally got a boner when that guy at the DX called you a little boy,” Steve was saying.

Soda blushed bright red. “That's a lie!” 

Two-Bit turned to Ponyboy, clearly trying hard not to laugh. “He did. I was there.” Pony whacked him. 

“Yeah, you did,” Steve replied, grinning like he couldn't stop for the life of him. Steve loved making fun of other people and laughing at them about it. Ponyboy thought Steve was a jerk, but Two-Bit and Sodapop seemed to believe he was some kind of comedian. “And anyway, I’m taller than you.”

Soda only stepped up to the challenge. “Maybe so, but my dick is bigger.”

“You sure about that?”

"Wait," Ponyboy whispered to Two-Bit, "What are they even fighting about?"

Two-Bit shrugged. "From what I've gathered," he said, "They're arguing over who would top if they were gay together."

Ponyboy sighed. Why were his friends so weird?

Soda snorted at Steve's previous remark. “Well,” he said, and promptly pulled down his pants. God, Ponyboy did _not_ want to see this. At least Two-Bit seemed to be enjoying himself.

Steve only smirked and pulled down his own boxers. There was a silence as all three other boys eyes widened. Ponyboy glanced next to him to find Two-Bit drooling from the mouth.

“Oh man,” he murmured. “I would _so_ suck that.”

“Dude, gross!”

Sodapop took a step towards Steve, eyeing his dick almost hungrily. “Man, you’re fucking _hung_.”

Steve grinned. “What, you want some?”

There was something in both of their eyes (and Two-Bit's, actually, but Ponyboy wasn't paying attention to him), that gave Ponyboy a _really_ bad feeling. _Oh god_ , screamed his brain _, oh god wait I really don’t want to see this-_

And suddenly Steve was pushing Soda onto the bed and Soda was spreading his legs and Ponyboy was fucking _leaving_ because he had seen quite enough, thank you very much.

“I do not want to see this,” he announced, just loud enough for Two-Bit to hear.

Two-Bit’s eyes were glued to the two boys across the room, who had miraculously not noticed they were being watched. “I _do_.”

Ponyboy only rolled his eyes and grabbed Two-Bit by the arm, dragging him into the backyard. Two-Bit gave a short, indignant yelp. “Well,” he said, once they were out of earshot, "I guess we figured out who tops.”

“Yeah,” Ponyboy agreed, although it was something he hadn’t ever really wanted to know. “I guess we did.”


End file.
